Unpleasant experiences,
are first of all unpleasant.
Often they have to do with
borders that are crossed
and engaging in conflict.
What you can learn from them:
Where are the borders?
How do I better spot the borders?
What are my borders?
What do I do when somebody crosses them?
What is the end result of engaging in conflict for me?
How can I better avoid conflict?
How do I better provoke conflict?